Accomplishment

Today I have been reading about Feminism, equality, and accomplishment.

This great thing I want to do with my life.

What I have wanted to do in my life has changed according to where I was in my life.  In college I wanted to be successful.  I wanted to be known as knowledgeable in my field, to be good at what I do, and sought after for that reason.  In the back of my head I wanted to be a mom too.

In graduate school I started out the same way.  Though, I had to prove myself more.  Until the day I realized that most of the time I spent studying in the library was researching pregnancy and birth.

Then I became a Mom.  These little beings have consumed my life.  It makes me wish I had studied MFHD and Tailoring, and worked as a housekeeper.  It is hard to feel accomplished when the task repeats day after day and STILL there is more to do.  When those little eyes look up at you though and the little arms get wrapped around your neck, you realize that this is a great thing I am doing with my life.  I am honored and blessed that I can stay home with my babies. My husband and I are working on working together.  I have never felt like what I want is out of reach because I am female.  I am a mother, I am strong, and I do great things.

I realize that this is not the only great thing I want to do with my life. I want to comfort and console.  I want to connect with others, and teach them how to live better lives.  I want to garden.  Oh, how I want to garden.  I want to help others feed themselves. I want to teach people to be themselves, feed themselves, heal themselves and learn to sustain themselves, and others.  Heal hearts who have been hurt by injustice, or inequality.  Ultimately I want to be involved in Community Gardens, Farmers Markets and local gardening.

Ritual

This past month I have been reading.  Checking books out at the Library and actually reading them.  Novel, I know.

A couple weeks ago I came across "French Women Don't Get Fat".   Now, I'm sure most of us have heard of this book, it was published in 2005 (doesn't time FLY?).  I know I had, but I couldn't say I knew what it was really about.  So, I checked it out.

What I got out of it was that we need to keep our eating moderate, and we need to move more.  Really, it reminded me of back in college when I would lose weight during the semester. I had a goal of getting up the RB stairs or Widstoe stairs, two at time without panting and almost fainting at the top.  So all semester I would run the stairs on the way to class.  I even had a class on the 7th floor of the Kimball Tower one semester.  I took the stairs.  Now I kind of wish I had a two story house, for that purpose.

Also, it said to never let yourself get hungry (DESPERATE), and to give yourself treats- but not everyday.  Make them really treats.

One other thing was the idea of making eating a ritual.  We have rituals in our lives everyday, from the way we wash our face, to our bed time routine.  I have to say I LOVE this idea.  I had gotten very sloppy with my dinning habits.  Cleaning the kitchen while my kids ate breakfast, reading or checking email while eating, generally not engaging with my kids, trying to make it a time when I could check out.

Well. I decided to start making meals more of a ritual.  I started with breakfast. Later that week I read this on Apartment Therapy. A challenge to make morning rituals.  Sadly for them, as well as many of the people commenting, they don't have children.  I know some people with children get up at 5 am just to be alone, but I know me.  That won't happen unless my husband stops working nights (i.e. I still get woken up a lot at night).  But I love mornings.  I love slow, calm, happy mornings. This is where I started.

I make up the table.  Table cloth, center piece (which is either flowers, or, at the moment winter squash).  I make soft boiled eggs, toast and sliced fruit for us, and some tisane (herbal tea) in the heirloom silver tea pot from Morrocco, for me.  I highly recommend the tea.  Nothing slows down the morning like sipping tea.  It makes it really special.

I have found once I sit, it doesn't matter whether the house or kitchen is a mess.  The morning light coming through the window and my kids busy picking away the egg shells from their eggs gives me much more peace than trying to get my house clean while they eat.  We have made it a ritual in our home.

Now I have become enamored with table cloths and little tea pots.

Patio and Inspiration

I love outdoor spaces. The fact that our little southwestern house has an enclosed front patio and a back patio makes me very happy. I just wish I had furniture to fill them with. Right now our back patio has a turtle baby pool, a makeshift wood and PVC pipe shelf (that I am actually very grateful for) and an old bench that needs its screws tightened. Last week I threw our old futon mattress out there for me to hang out on while Maja swims. I would love to cover it with some fun bright outdoor fabric so I don't have to worry about it so much. Another thing I would love would be a canvas awning, like this one, to shade our west facing patio in the afternoon, plus it would add so much fun color!

The rest of these pictures are some inspiration for myself. I have been looking at small house/ cottage house plans by Ross Chapin, and many of his homes have built in eating areas. Honestly, I have a love-hate relationship with built in's. I love how they save space, but I don't know if a brood of children would try to kill eachother. I guess they would get used to it. These pictures from Apartment Therapy show that this space can be beautiful and happy, not cranky and miserable!

here's to happiness

Naomi over at Rockstar Diaries asked everyone a week ago to write down 10 things that make them terribly happy and send them to her. I didn't send in a list- I was REALLY busy a week ago. But here is a list from me to you.


suzanna's 10 things which make her terribly happy:

1. The smell of fresh cut grass
2. coloring
3. rain in the desert
4. being held
5. handmade peppermint soap
6. white bread with butter
7. eating beans right from the garden
8. hearing portuguese
9. my daughter saying 'Da-da' and shreiking with delight
10. feeling loved

here's to happiness.
and the little things.

Quote

My friend Suzanne is a head gardener at the Timpanogas Temple. The other day she overheard a quote from one of the volunteer gardeners.

"A gardener's work is never done--and therein lies the pleasure. Happiness stems from always having something to do, something to love, and something to look forward to."

Dreams and Dirt

Ooo, there are a great many things I want to do! A lot of this was spurred by a trip to Barnes and Noble yesterday. Clemens wanted to celebrate finishing the editing on his book. (Can you tell we don't get out much?) I found a great magazine called Mary Jane's Farm, it is all about becoming a farmgirl. Really cute magazine. In it I read about some other things that I had to research.

The major one is a book called "Food not Lawns", I love the idea of having a backyard homestead. Since it may be quite a while for me to aquire acrage to have livestock, I want to have chickens and a huge vegetable garden. Fresh eggs sound delicious. I want to grow enough food for my family and to give (or sell eventually) to all of my neighbors.

Mother Earth News Magazine is by far my favorite magazine right now. So much so, that Clemens got me a subscriptions for my birthday. It talks all about growing food, raising food, natural energy, and sustainable home building/living. Did I mention it talks about raising animals- like chickens, oh yes.

Until then, here is an update on my little garden. I think that my garden has loved that the night time temperatures have jumped from the mid 30's to the mid 50's. It is doing wonders for my germination rates.

This little snap bean grew from just germinating and above the ground this morning, to THIS this evening!
The shady area of my garden, until summer is in full swing, it has onions, little spinich that are getting their true leaves, and the lettuces. Not pictured are the brussels sprouts, bell peppers and beets.

This is a scallop squash, it sprouted this week too!

My onions are going CRAZY!

THERE IS HOPE YET! That I may get tomatoes this year! My two striped cherry tomatoes have sprouted, along with the yellow brandywines and a great white! I am so excited!

I read this scripture last night and it made me think. In conference we heard about not coveting what we see our neighbors have, what we see in stores, and on the internet. I think I might try to live this one better.